Communication Thursday: Just Exactly How Do You Inhale? (part 2 of proper breathing)

In the previous post, we talked about proper posture when standing or sitting to communicate. To recap: stand with your feet hip-width apart (draw an imaginary line from your second toes, through the center of your ankles, the center of your knees and then up to the hip points [the parts that just out to the front]). Stack your spine so that it maintains its natural curvature back to front but is stacked straight up and down from side to side.

To breathe and stand properly, imagine that your belly is a submarine. Now imagine the hollow tube of the periscope going up the spine and through the lungs and up into the mouth. Your mouth then becomes the viewfinder. If a periscope isn't straight and curved where it is supposed to be straight and curved, it won't work. In the same vein, if your spine isn't straight, then the breath won't work, or at least it won't work efficiently.

Now, practice inhaling. Let the breath come into your belly. In other words, allow the belly to expand as you inhale. Imagine a balloon where your organs would be. If you filled that balloon with air (like taking a breath), it would expand. And your trunk needs to do the same thing when you inhale. So, when you inhale, let the lungs expand, and then your diaphragm (the muscle below your lungs) will flatten out and down and will by necessity move the organs below it out of the way to make room. That's why your belly expands on a proper inhale.

The other part of this? Your shoulders have to stay relaxed. If they rise up on the inhalation, you are doing bang-up job of breathing into the top third of your lungs, but you are not getting any air into the lower two-thirds. And in order to breathe fully, the lungs have to be fully or nearly filled. Try another inhale. Did your shoulders rise up? Yes? Well, in that case, we need to bring out the big guns, as they say. 

For this next part, you will want to be somewhere you can comfortably lie down, and you will need a book. If you need to wait until you are at home, go for it. I'll be right here when you come back ...

Okay, now that you are some place where you can lie down, grab the book, and lie down. Lie flat and comfortably. Place the book on your belly and take in a deep breath. Now exhale. Do it again. What happens to the book on your belly when you inhale?

With any luck, you said, "The book rises when I inhale." That is exactly what should happen. The book should rise on an inhalation and it should fall on the exhalation. Take another few breaths and get accustomed to the feeling of the book rising and falling on the inhalations and exhalations. Next, take note of your shoulders. What's happening to them as you breathe while lying down?

What I'm hoping you realize is that they don't move. When you lie down to breathe, your shoulders have no choice but to remain still because they are resting against the floor or the bed, etc. That frees you up to allow the trunk to expand outward properly since the shoulders can't rise. Please remember that when the shoulders rise on inhalation, we are only filling up the top parts of our lungs, and since what we are after is a full breath, we need to remove the shoulders from the equation. The, "Lie down and put a book on your belly," technique is a perfect way to practice that.

Take a few more deep breaths lying down and try to remember what that feels like. Then stand up and try it that way. See if you can maintain that same feeling of keeping the shoulders down and relaxed while the belly expands.* 

Once you have that in your body and are comfortable with it, you will be one giant step closer to breathing fully and deeply. And you will be far more able to breathe properly. The next technique we will discuss will be the exhalation and the supported breath. Now that you know how to inhale properly, next week, we will learn how to exhale and use your supported breath to speak and communicate more effectively.

 *Bear in mind, this sort of deep breathing might make you a little light-headed so be careful as you deepen your breath. If you do get lightheaded, sit down and put your head between your knees until the feeling passes.

They all say to stop and breathe, but how exactly do we do it?

Oh my goodness there are a ton of posts on mindfulness, meditation, and anxiety reduction. Almost all of them have some form of, "stop, be still, and breathe to calm yourself." It's great advice. And it works. The trouble is, how do you stop, be still, and breathe when you might be scared, anxious, nervous, or downright freakin' out?

What are the magical steps? How do you grab onto the focus and calm that lets you take any sort of breath when you are already stressed? And even if you manage to take a deep breath, are you doing it correctly? Will you get the most relaxation bang for your inhalation buck?

Most of us breathe inefficiently. I've taught thousands of people to sing and speak and I've watched them breathe to assess what they are doing and how they are doing it. Almost every single person breathes in such a way that she or he uses up a great deal of energy and motion on the breath but almost never gets the full benefit of either that breath or that energy expenditure.

So, let's take a look at breathing. In these next few posts on Communication Thursdays, we'll go over it step by step, and get you the information you need to breathe deeply and effectively.

We breathe involuntarily. We don't think about it. Some people have to think about it because it's not a voluntary action to them and that must be arduous. Others have breathing issues like asthma, and although this post might be helpful to them, I admit it's not geared towards them. For the rest of us, breathing requires almost no thought. If we aren't sick or having other breathing issues, we breathe easily. However, although we breathe easily, we often breathe inefficiently. And if we want to reap the rewards deep breathing can bring, we must become efficient breathers. With full and mindful breathing, we will reap the many benefits that such breathing can bring.

Let's take the next few minutes together and breathe with purpose. I'll show you how. Stand up (if you aren't already) and take a big ol' breath. I'll wait right here. :)

How did that feel?

Did your shoulders rise up when you inhaled? Did your belly, back, and chest feel tight or cramped? If you don't remember, bring your awareness to your body, take another breath and try to answer these questions. I'll bet you answered yes to at least one of them. If so, then you can improve your breathing.

Did you feel balanced when you inhaled? How did it feel to take that deep breath? See if you can become aware of how you are inhaling and exhaling. Take care if you start to feel a little lightheaded. We are not used to deep breathing and the extra oxygen can make us feel a little woozy. If you start to feel that, sit down, relax and try it again after the feeling passes.

Ready to try again? Good.

Now, let's take the breaths we were taking and make them even better. 

First, let's think about our alignment. Whether we are breathing deeply to sing, speak, address discomfort or just for the sake of these exercises, it is a good idea to maintain good posture and alignment. Let's start from the bottom. 

Our stance is the core of good breath. And a good stance will be to keep your feet hip width whether or you are standing or sitting. So, let's try it. Stand (or sit, if that is what is comfortable for you) with your feet hip width apart. To make sure your feet are hip width apart, stand (or sit) with your feet facing forward draw an imaginary line from your second toe (of each foot), through the middle of your ankle, up through the middle of your knee, and up to your hip points. Hip points are the part of your hip that points in front of you or juts out to the front. It is not the outside of your hips. If you stand with this alignment, you are well on your way to maintaining good posture.

Next time, we will talk about your trunk, shoulders, neck, and head and how to maintain proper alignment in those parts of your body. Once you have proper alignment, we will talk inhalations, exhalations, and every part in between to get you breathing deeply, fully, and effectively.

In the meantime, whenever you must speak, sing, or even just stand for any length of time, try to remember this alignment tip. It will help you stand longer and more easily. 

Until next time, here's a thought on breath.

Relatively pain-free mobile-friendly website redirects instructions

I spent last night figuring out how to optimize my various websites for mobile devices. Per google's new rules (http://blog.hubspot.com/marketing/google-algorithm-change-mobile-friendly), priority is now given to websites that are mobile-device friendly.

If you are tech savvy, here's a website with the java script for redirecting your pages. (I send big thanks to the person who wrote the script and put it up!)

https://css-tricks.com/snippets/javascript/redirect-mobile-devices/

Then, you just need to create the mobile friendly pages and upload them. Bear in mind, there are different requirements for the various devices. You can either make a site that will fit them all or you will have to specify and create pages for each one.


Here's google's page for testing your site to make sure it passes muster for their new crawler.
https://www.google.com/webmasters/tools/mobile-friendly/https://www.google.com/webmasters/tools/mobile-friendly/

One big tip from me to you: make your images percentage sizes instead of static sizes and you will be more likely to pass google's testing process.

This is what my author page looks like on an iPhone. Below it, is what the actual website looks like (and here's the link to the non-mobile site so you can see it "live:" http://izoldatwriter.com/). The cool thing is that if you go to it via a computer, it will show you the main site. If you go to it on an mobile device, it redirects to the one that looks like the image. But, you still type in the same url.

Cheers!

Voice-to-Text, a primer

I love Voice-to-text (V-t-T). As the technology improves, conducting business via V-t-T becomes  easier and more accessible. Business and communication become more portable and that creates more flexibility in how and where we manage our affairs.

For example, I can now write emails and texts while walking my dog. I can give quick answers to questions on my phone without having to get to a keyboard (or use my thumb typing to give answers on my phone).

In fact, I've gotten so accustomed to using this method of communication, that I am guilty of leaving voicemails with spoken punctuation. (e.g. "Hi [period]. This is Izolda [period].")

Although this method of communication has become ubiquitous, I believe few utilize its full, robust capabilities.

So, here's a quick primer on what to say to get the desired results.

First of all, you need to know how to access the feature. I am not sure how to do it on android devices, but on iOS devices, select the microphone button to the left of the space bar on your phone's keyboard. The bottom part of your screen will become gray and a white sound wave line will move in accordance with your voice and what you are saying.

Once you are done speaking, select the done key. Please note: voice to text only works for snippets at a time. You can record a few sentences, but then you have to select done or you will run out of memory for the phone to be able to make the translation from voice to text. You don't want to lose any of what you have said, so make sure you select done and restart the microphone every 5 to 7 sentences.

Punctuation:

Common punctuation must be said by its name. So, if I want to say the following sentence via V-t-T:

If we are going to the movies tonight, we will need to leave by 7:00pm.

I can say it like this: The V-t-T version is in green below. (Don't say the [ ]. Just say the words inside them.)

If we are going to the movies tonight [comma] we will need to leave by seven pm [period]

If you want to incorporate a quote and/or a question mark, try this:

And then he said, "I'll see you later." Can you believe that?

And then he said [comma] [quote] I'll see you later [period] [close quote] Can you believe that [question mark]

Here are two more quick ideas.

If you want to start a new paragraph or a new line, just say the words [new line] before the sentence that you want to begin the new line/paragraph.

For example.

Do you want to go? 
Anyway, I do, so I'm buying tickets.

The V-t-T version

Do you want to go [question mark] [new line] Anyway [comma] I do [comma] so I'm buying tickets [period]

Here are two that you will find useful. To make a :-), say "smiley." To make a ;-), say "winkie."

And the last tip is a tricky bugger. It's when you want to capitalize something. The V-t-T word for capitalizing a word is "cap." But, you have to say it and the word you want to say quickly. If you hesitate between the word "cap" and the word you want to capitalize, V-t-T will just type in the word "cap" and then not capitalize the word you want to capitalize.

So, if you want V-t-T to write, "Let's go get French Fries tonight." you will say it like this:

The V-t-T version:

Let's go get [cap]French [cap]Fries tonight [period]

I hope these have helped you get a grasp on how to use this fantastic tech to communicate more effectively.

Remember, you have to have a good idea of what you want to say, because pauses mean something in V-t-T. It's an interesting point to ponder. To use this tech, we must think about what we wish to say. We need to have it planned out, and we must be efficient with our language.

I believe this method of communicating might help us better prepare how we communicate because if we don't plan it and we hesitate, things will get mucked up. The tech does exactly what we tell it to do, no more no less.

I will be curious to see how voice-to-text and other technologies evolve the way we communicate.

How about you? Do you use voice-to-text? Do you like it? How has it changed how you communicate?

My Faux Pas transformed into a Faux Pie: Say what you mean with the appropriate flavor

I can no longer leave voicemails without adding in the Voice-to-Text commands that make words into sentences.

I just left a voicemail that went like this:

"Hi [period]. This is Izolda [period]. I had a couple of questions for you [period]. Can you give me a call when you get a chance [comma], please [question mark]? Thanks [period]."

It was only after I left the message that I remembered I had called someone's phone and wasn't recording voice-to-text.

Doh[exclamation point]!

This faux pas sparked me to ponder the rate at which our communication methods are changing. Not only have the methods with which we communicate changed, but our language is evolving at a tremendous pace. For example, my language has changed to the state where I must consciously remind myself which form of communication I am using in order to express myself appropriately. Why? Because there are so many methods from which to choose.

Let's say that communication and the various modes of achieving clear, confident communication are a big, luscious pie. When you communicate clearly with someone, you each indulge in a delicious piece of pie. When you don't communicate clearly, one of you might be thinking you are eating cherry pie, while the other dines on pumpkin.

To make things more challenging, we have more communication modalities than ever before. Each faction of the communication pie has its own ingredients. Each has its own methods of ensuring that we have communicated clearly.

Some of these are the structure and inherent rules of each mode of communication. For example, few of us are going to write sixty-two tweets because we have a long rant to express. For the most part, we all stick to the "140 characters and you're done with that thought" paradigm.

If we are using Instagram (the photo sharing app), we must snap our photo so that nothing vital is missing out of the square shape the app requires. In fact, our iOS devices now have a "square" photo setting so we will see exactly what will appear in each picture.

Texting has its language with shortcuts, nicknames, and emojis. More new communication methods  appear every day and some die out. We have to stay on top of them in order to maintain our skills.

I am fascinated by how we use our written words and how we say our spoken words and how those actions affect our proficiency at communicating. In my case, I was using an amalgam of spoken word to written word. I didn't stay mindful about which one I was using. However, perhaps, there might just be too many slices of pie from which to choose.

My latest bane, as you can see from the above faux pas, is voice-to-text. Voice-to-text is still relatively new. But, still, I should have paid better attention. Because of the evolution of communication modalities, I like many others, have gotten out of the habit of calling on the phone to actually speak with someone on the other end. Instead, I have gotten too accustomed to speaking into my phone to record my voice and translate it to text. This has become such an ingrained habit that when I had to leave a voicemail, I forgot the modality in which I was operating and left the message as if I had been doing voice-to-text.

Some of this is due to my not being sufficiently mindful. Some of it, I believe, is caused by the vast array of the different formats for communication. Our communication pie more closely resembles a sort of Frankenstein pie. Instead of one chocolate pie, we are communicating via a pie that contains myriad flavors. This pie contains many wedges and each of them is different. So, my Coconut cream pie message might be received by someone who rightly is expecting key lime. We are then inherently asking others to forgive us our trespasses when instead of delivering one flavor of communication, we deliver something else entirely.

Then, we can only hope that the person with whom we've just communicated likes some flavor of pie.

An informal experiment in approachability, communication, and cute vs shlubby

I've been running an informal experiment for the last couple of weeks. Those of you who know me, know what I'm shaped like. Those who don't, take a look at my pic below. I am, what a friend recently described, curvy. Am I thin? Nope. Am I in shape? Mostly (will get back into better healthy shape once the knee issues are resolved). So, here's the experiment.

In the last couple of weeks, I've been going out at almost the exact same time to walk the dog along the exact same route. Sometimes, I dress cute (shortish shorts and a tight tank top). Sometimes, I dress what I'm going to term shlubby (loose pants and a loose t-shirt). On the "cute" days, I brush my hair and put on a bit of makeup (read eyeliner). On the "shlubby" days, I go out with rat's nest hair and my natural face.

On half the days (both cute and shlubby), I bop along to music. I dance. I smile at nothing and generally have a great time. On the other half of the days, I trudge along. I still look around but I scowl rather than smile.

So, the informal grid I've created is as follows:
1/4 days cute and boppy
1/4 days cute and trudgy
1/4 days shlubby and boppy
1/4 days shlubby and trudgy

What I was trying to gauge: How many people (men and/or women) said hello or smiled or waved. The reason I brought my body shape into the entire process is because I've often wondered at how we view people who are bigger. Do we dismiss them as a matter of course? Are they truly invisible as I have felt myself to be when I've been heavier than I am now? I am at that magical weight right now where people pay attention to me. I get hellos and smiles and waves pretty much all the time. Five or ten pounds heavier and those smiles and waves all but disappear unless they are from people I know.

I'm not sure body shape and/or size plays a significant role in this experiment, but I wanted to mention it case it makes a difference.

The results:
The days when the vast majority of people said hello or waved or smiled: cute and boppy
The days with the second greatest number shlubby and boppy
The days with the third greatest number: cute and trudgy
The days with the distant lowest number: shlubby and trudgy

I know what my conclusions are and will post them later. But I'm curious as to what yours might be. Thoughts?

Stay safe, but not too safe.

Today's cards: Nine of Swords, Page of Rods, Eight of Cups. Oy. Be careful out there, today. The Nine of Swords promises lots of time to wring your hands (though you don't have to). The Page of Rods says you might need to do some fast talking to get you what you want today (though you ought to do just fine. Just speak from your passions and all will be well). But, the Eight of Cups reminds us everything is funneling into exactly where we need to be. Now. Here. Today.

One of my favorite quotes is: "Everything that happens, happens exactly as it should because that's the way it happens." I wish I knew how to cite it but I just don't remember where I read it. Regardless, it's really true today. Even if crappy stuff goes down, remember, it's all leading you somewhere. Whether you have lessons to learn, or conversations to have, or arduous things to do, it's all going where you need to go. Eventually. Stay safe, but not too safe.

With love.